We are living in a Western society and surrounded by unIslamic things, trying to tempt us. I always feel for the youth, growing up in such a society, where immorality is everywhere you look. All the things which used to be taboo and looked down upon, is now the norm and accepted. In fact, if you say anything against this, you are turned upon.
When I grew up, it was expected for you to give up your seat on the bus/train to elderly women etc. But now, if you do, some other youth will take your seat. Such is the state of the society we are now living in. We should all be concerned with the society that we are living in. Violence and bad morality are slowly dominating this country the youth are being influenced by TV and Music. The bad messages being transmitted by the media seems to be affecting the British youth. Even the Muslim youth are being affected by these messages. Therefore, it is important to counteract these messages with good messages.
The Holy Qur’an, Chapter 3, verse 111 relates:
You are the best people raised for the good of mankind; you enjoin what is good and forbid evil and believe in Allah.
We should strive to promote goodness and good values and lead by example.
There was a lovely incident that happened during the Khilafat of Hazrat Umar, may Allah be pleased with him. He was doing his usual secret rounds to see the true condition of the people and he heard a conversation of a mother and daughter.
The mother was telling her daughter that she was making very little profit selling the milk and that when she was little, they use to add some water to the milk to increase the profit. The daughter replied that, ‘at that time she was not a Muslim, but now we cannot cheat.’
The mother tried to reassure her that it was okay to add some water, but the daughter responded by saying that we must follow the Islamic injunctions. The mother retorted that neither the Khalifa nor his officers would find out, so no harm. But the daughter refused to budge and said that that might be so, but ‘how can we escape the notice of Allah and our own conscience.”
The attitude and piety of the daughter impressed Hazrat Umar greatly and he ordered a man to purchase some milk from the girl the following day to see if water had been mixed with it. When he found out that the girl had kept her resolve despite the urgings from her mother, he said “Such a girl would become a great mother. Her integrity is not weighed in coins; it is to be measured in the scale of national values. I shall offer her the highest award in my gift, and which shall also be in the highest interest of the nation.”
Hazrat Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, then brought the mother and daughter to his court and turning to his own sons said, “Here is a gem of a girl, who would make a great mother. I desire that one of you should take this girl as a wife. I know no better bride than this girl of sterling character. In the matters of wedlock, it should be the character and not the statue in life, that should count.”
Asim, his third son, who was unmarried, offered to marry the girl and the milkmaid became the daughter-in-law of the Khalifa and from their grandchildren came Hazrat Umar bin Abdul Aziz who became a great Khalifa of Islam and renowned for his piety and simplicity.
It is a lovely incident which shows the importance of developing piety and good morals in our children and also look for those qualities when choosing a partner for our child.
The Holy Prophet, may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said:
There is no better and superior present that a father can give to his children than cultivation of good morals.
I remember once that Hazrat Mirza Tahir Ahmad, the 4th Khalifa of the Ahmadiyya Muslim Community, may Allah have mercy on him, was interviewed about the effect of the British lifestyle on the youth. He said:
I feel that the youth of today can guard against the so-called western temptations. It is so easy otherwise to fall into a trap of being an over-puritan – too strict in religious matters – and then not being able to cope, break down totally, and then of course nothing may be taboo in one’s mind.
If a person does not cross extremes but takes a licence to mix with western culture, it should be to a limit without being influenced by western people, but to influence them through your actions and adherence to principles. I found this method very successful and therefore I had a large circle of friends amongst fellow students and also professors.
This is very important advice that we should always try to ‘raise people to our level, do not go down to other people’s level’. In other words, we should ‘Lead by example, but be leaders, do not follow others to try and please them’.
We have to make sure that our youth has a good understanding of their religion and strive to lead by example. They should mix and integrate but keep the Islamic values. Therefore, we need to instil Taqwa (Righteousness), encouraging them to perform their daily prayers and help them to develop a close link with Allah, the One God. Likewise, they need to hear people’s personal experiences about Allah and how religion has benefited them. Give examples, like the story of Hazrat Umar.
It is important that they need to understand about a living God, that He is constantly around us, listening and watching us and we will all be answerable to Him on the Day of Judgement.
Hazrat Mirza Ghulam Ahmad, the Promised Messiah and Imam Mahdi said,
Before you say something, you should think over it well and try to understand what the consequence of saying that thing is going to be. You should also be sure whether Islam permits you to say that or not. Unless you have thought over in this vein you should not say anything. It is better to keep silent if the talk has to create disorder.
But this also does not behove a Believer that he should hesitate to tell the truth. He should not mind the taunts of the people, nor should he fear anyone to tell the truth or to bear a witness in favour of the truth
Our children face many issues in this unIslamic society, the advice that we give should be based on the Islamic teachings, keeping Allah’s pleasure always in mind. There has to be compromise, but there also needs to be limits.
The Holy Prophet, may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him said:
Make religion easy for others to follow, do not make it difficult. Similarly, present religion in a pleasing manner; Do not make it repulsive to others.
For the sake of peace, we should not sell out our faith or water it down, instead look for an answer which is both pleasing and Islamic.